that a 90s top 100 playlist would make me feel better about everything.
There is someone who I’ve been going on dates with who has an eating disorder…
She is very sweet, caring, and smart. I care about her but I’m too unsure to really want her. The day we met she experienced a crisis with her health. (lost consciousness, took a hard fall, went to the E.R., got stitches, etc) Its apparent that she has an e.d. … she’ll only eat a small amount of liquids & will always go to the bathroom shortly after… & she’s appears as though she may just disappear (so gaunt). She hasn’t talked about it & I really don’t know if its appropriate to bring it up as something to talk about.
I know hurt. I know self-hatred. I know feeling sickness. But I don’t know what it’s like to experience an eating disorder. I strive to always be sensitive, caring, & respectful.
I enjoy her company & her optimism & her visions & her interests. But I want for her to be alive & healthy & whole & happy.
I have a habit of making friends & romantic relationships with people whom I play the role of ‘supporter’. And it’s not healthy for me (triggers feelings related to emotionally manipulative parents). When emotionally involved, it benefits me at first to be a supporter & when I can’t ‘make’ people happy, I feel inadequate and extreme self-hatred…
is this possible to date her? & if so, how can I actively care for her & her health if I do decide to go on more dates?
Any advice/ suggestions from anyone but especially people on either end of the spectrum would be great (the supporter/ non e.d. partner/ friend and person experiencing the e.d.). I’m not an asshole & I respect this person, but I have no idea on how to proceed while also taking care of myself…
Can Dialectics Break Bricks? (1973)